Epilogue

When Lila died on October 7th, 1958, she was only thirty-six years old. She never knew what was in the pills that Merlin gave her. During World War II, Nazi troops were given enormous supplies of methamphetamine to help them overcome exhaustion. When US troops entered the war, they were given amphetamines for similar reasons. They found that it not only kept them awake but also made them more focused, optimistic, and less hungry. Both stimulants are highly addictive, increase users’ heart rate and blood pressure, and are known to cause pregnancy complications, including pre-eclampsia (previously known as toxemia).

In the 1940s and 1950s, only five percent of white women in the United States were single mothers. Social services like welfare were available, but many women were either unaware of them or too ashamed (perhaps too proud) to accept support from the government. When World War II ended, many women—even if they were married and/or well-educated—were frozen out of jobs that paid well enough to support a family.

At the end of her life, Lila thought the Schneiders had abandoned her, but they had not. Despite the divorce, Herman claimed her body and buried her as Lila Schneider in Neshonoc Cemetery just north of West Salem. Four years after her husband died, Emma married Herman, and they lived together until he died from a heart attack in 1973. Having met because of Lila’s children, they wanted to take Myrtle Joyce, Hazel, and Bonnie, but the state would not allow it since they had too little income and no legal claims. John lived with his father and Emma until 1963 when he was tragically killed in a tractor accident.

Herman and Emma, circa 1970

Like her mother, Alice struggled to live with Herman on the farm. She shuffled through various living arrangements including the orphanage and foster homes. As a teenager, she went to live with Myrtle and Carl Schneider and stayed with them during high school. Unlike her half-brother Randy, they did not adopt her.

After Lila’s death, Myrtle Joyce lived in foster homes until she aged out of the system. In 1964 when she became engaged, the announcement in the newspaper listed Herman Schneider as her father. Hazel and Bonnie were sent to live with Izro’s son, LeRoy; however, the arrangement did not last. After LeRoy had a heart attack and his wife became pregnant again, they decided to give custody back to the state, and the girls were sent to an orphanage. They were adopted by an unrelated couple with no biological children of their own. When the adoption papers were drawn up, Hazel requested to change her name to June. As adults, all of the siblings (including Larry) managed to find one another again and have stayed in touch.

Both of Lila’s parents outlived her by more than a decade, but none of the Slabacks took custody of her children for more than a few months. Veda died from cancer in 1971. She never went to nursing school and never worked outside of the home after she was married to Red. Her daughter, Patty, still visits Myrtle Joyce from time to time.

The effects of Lila’s life continue to ripple through the generations; she now has fifteen grandchildren and more than two dozen great-grandchildren, including me and my children. I was never encouraged to think of her as anything but a problem, but the process of writing this book has reshaped what I think about her life. She tried so hard to be herself and to live on her own terms, regardless of what anyone thought about her. This is the kind of courage it takes to disrupt generational patterns of dysfunction and discrimination. Lila paid a steep price, but with her story out in the open, I choose to draw from her strength and resilience.

Notes

I wrote this epilogue in 2020 and revised it in 2022. Although Myrtle Joyce and my mother, Alice (Lila’s second daughter) passed away in February 2024, I have chosen not to revise the epilogue again. This project has taught me just how much our stories outlive us.

For more information, see Magnus Chan, Jocelyn Joy Chan, and James M. Wright¹, Ray J. Defalque and Amos J. Wright², Donald J. Hernandez³, Vorapong Phupong and Darigar Darojn⁴, and Nicolas Rasmussen⁵.

Chan, Magnus, Jocelyn Joy Chan, and James M. Wright. “Effect of Amphetamines on Blood Pressure.” Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, no. 12 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1002/14651858.CD007896.pub3.

Defalque, Ray J., and Amos J. Wright. “Methamphetamine for Hitler’s Germany: 1937 to 1945.” Bulletin of Anesthesia History 29, no. 2 (2011): 21–32. https://doi.org/10.1016/S1522-8649(11)50016-2.

Hernandez, Donald J. America’s Children: Resources from Family, Government, and the Economy. New York: Russell Sage Foundation, 1993.

Phupong, Vorapong, and Darigar Darojn. “Amphetamine Abuse in Pregnancy: The Impact on Obstetric Outcome.” Archives of Gynecology and Obstetrics 276 (2007): 167–70. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00404-007-0320-x.

Rasmussen, Nicolas. “Amphetamine-Type Stimulants: The Early History of Their Medical and Non-Medical Uses.” In The Neuropsychiatric Complications of Stimulant Abuse, edited by Pille Taba, Andrew Lees, and Katrin Sikk, 120:9–25. International Review of Neurobiology, 2015. https://doi.org/10.1016/bs.irn.2015.02.001.

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1. “Effect of Amphetamines on Blood Pressure,” Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, no. 12 (2020), https://doi.org/10.1002/14651858.CD007896.pub3.

2. “Methamphetamine for Hitler’s Germany: 1937 to 1945,” Bulletin of Anesthesia History 29, no. 2 (2011): 21–32, https://doi.org/10.1016/S1522-8649(11)50016-2.

3. America’s Children: Resources from Family, Government, and the Economy (New York: Russell Sage Foundation, 1993).

4. “Amphetamine Abuse in Pregnancy: The Impact on Obstetric Outcome,” Archives of Gynecology and Obstetrics 276 (2007): 167–70, https://doi.org/10.1007/s00404-007-0320-x.

5. “Amphetamine-Type Stimulants: The Early History of Their Medical and Non-Medical Uses,” in The Neuropsychiatric Complications of Stimulant Abuse, ed. Pille Taba, Andrew Lees, and Katrin Sikk, vol. 120, International Review of Neurobiology, 2015, 9–25, https://doi.org/10.1016/bs.irn.2015.02.001.